The Only Time He Wasn't Sure
by Melethril
Summary: A little glimpse of Jess' mind when Luke destroyed that wall at the end of episode 2.14...


_Note_: A little insight in Jess' mind after Luke comes in to destroy the apartment wall in episode 2.14. When I watched the episode, I just thought he looked very jumpy in that scene and he actually flinches when Luke pats him on the shoulder… So, I let my muse go a little crazy…

**The only time he wasn't sure…**

Jess sat on the mattress in their apartment as usual listening to music and reading a book.

He heard the door open and Luke striding in, but he chose not to look up instead kept his focus on the book. He wondered if Luke already decided whether or not to buy a new place to live in.

His uncle didn't approach him, but walked past him towards the closet a few feet behind Jess.

The noise coming from Luke searching the wardrobe broke his concentration causing him to look up feeling aggravated. When he saw the large hammer in his uncle's hand his heart rate started to exhilarate rapidly.

Like a deer caught in the spotlight his eyes followed Luke who shouldered the heavy tool. When the man quickly walked past him he practically jumped out of his bed, though he was rather unsure what to do.

Luke would never… or would he? He had been annoyed, yes, and Jess hadn't exactly shown enthusiasm concerning moving into another apartment, but surly his uncle wouldn't destroy his things?

_He was twelve and Carl – Liz' new boyfriend who definitely was one of the most dominant ones she'd ever had, a man who wanted to control every aspect of their lives– decided one evening that Jess had too many belongings. He intruded his personal space by entering his room and confiscated several of his CDs ("A boy your age shouldn't be listenin' to this kinda crap music.") and books ("Ya think y'are better than us, right boy? But reading ain't make ya smarter. Y'are dumb, kid! Without'cha books, y'are nothin'.") forcing the young kid to watch when he burnt the books and destroyed the CDs by crushing them with his heavy boots leaving the child with the sole consolation that Carl hadn't found too many belongings and none of those he'd found were the most precious ones._

But this was Luke, not Carl or Tommy or J.J. or any of the guys his mother used to bring home!

Surely he hadn't aggravated the man too much? If he had, the man would have talked to him, wouldn't he have?

He felt panic rise within him. Well, he had been disrespectful and Tommy would have _knocked the sense _into him long ago, but this was Luke, his uncle!

For a moment he felt like crying.

_Please, I can't have screwed up this badly. Say something, Luke!_

To his surprise the owner of the diner downstairs didn't stop at his things but walked across the apartment standing in front of the wall which was placed directly above the diner.

With a light smile on his face, his whole body distributing waves of satisfaction (_Has Luke lost his mind?_) Luke looked at the wall taking the hammer in both hands…

Jess quickly looked from his uncle to the wall and back to his uncle…

_He hated hammers…_

He couldn't help but flinch when the hammer collided with the wall which of course was crushed in the process.

Jess' shoulders were hunched. He didn't know what to say.

_Make yourself as small as you can. Do not be seen!_

Carefully he looked up – oh, he felt so small that moment when standing in front of the stronger man. For the first time he realized how much he had counted on his uncle's patience, just how much he had trusted the man never to hurt him.

"That's your room. Finish it up."

Finally he was able to truly read his uncle's mood: He was indeed happy, seemed to be at peace with himself. Jess on the other hand didn't know what to feel.

The man could crush him if he wanted… He'd just proved that.

Luke handed him the hammer which he took instinctively staring at it for a moment.

"We'll hold hands and skip afterwards." His uncle said practically oozing with pleasure and then roughly hit his nephew's left arm which was probably meant to be a playful gesture.

Hopefully, Luke hadn't seen him flinch…

When parts of the wall came crushing down after his uncle left, he looked through the hole desperately trying to forget the waves of panic that had threatened to drown him.

This was the first time he hadn't been sure about what his uncle was going to do.

It usually took him the glimpse of an eye to differ those people with from those without any potential for violence. Luke he'd deducted to be non-violent and Jess had been so convinced of his very first judgment to be right, it frightened him to know that he might have been wrong.

_He didn't do anything. He neither hurt you nor destroyed any of your things. He'd never harm you._

He kept telling himself that, but he wasn't sure. How far would his uncle's patience go?

His knees gave in causing him to sit down on the ground. Desperately he put his hands on his face while trying to control his breathing.

It angered him to realize how much he'd come to trust Luke, it angered him to know how vulnerable that faith made him feel.

He heard the apartment door open and instantly tried to regain composure, but stood up a little too late.

"Jess! What happened?" Worry was evident in the older man's face when he ran over. He immediately crouched down next to him.

Jess was a professional at covering things up he didn't want other people to see, so the lie left his lips easily and without hesitation: "Just tripped and fell down a little inconveniently, no biggie."

"What? Did you feel dizzy? Do you come down with something?" Every word leaving Luke's mouth caused his nephew's insecurities to disappear more and more.

Jess felt so relieved, he suddenly had the urge to hug the other man, but didn't do so. He had to stay in character; otherwise the man would know something was wrong.

"I said I tripped," he drawled forcing his voice to sound irritable, "no vertigo, no nothing. Jeez, stop being such a worrywart! I'm fine."

"Oh well," Luke stammered, obviously embarrassed by his sudden display of emotion. Awkwardly he stood up, but not without trying to help up his nephew, but his hands were shrugged off exasperatedly.

"I'm going to the bathroom," Jess simply said quickly walking away from the crashed wall and the emotional situation. As he closed the door behind him he leant towards it, the back of his head touching the wood.

_It was okay. He was safe._

* * *

What do you think?

It's just a one-shot... For those of you interested in other Jess/Luke Family/Friendship scenes and stories, please read my other stories

Please: Read and review!


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